What is Conscious Uncoupling?
Posted on 19th November 2019
Now, having worked in MG Legal’s family law department for a number of years, prior to joining the Wills and Probate team, I was shocked to come across the term ‘conscious uncoupling’ despite it never having been mentioned during my day-to-day job.
Like me, you may be wondering what that could even possibly mean. Well, conscious uncoupling is the concept that ending a marriage or relationship is a positive step for the parties involved, which will benefit, rather than harm them.
Breakups are often considered to be a painful and emotional time, whereby one party devastates the other, leaving ill-feelings and a whole river’s worth of tears. However, seemingly the process of conscious uncoupling is becoming more popular, with the coin termed by the (brilliant) Gwyneth Paltrow to describe the end of her relationship with former husband, Chris Martin.
Now, five years later, I’ve once again heard the term on popular television, this time on the Amazon original series, Lucifer.
So, it’s led me to wonder whether this is the new way forward if couples want to keep things amicable: do we describe the couple as consciously uncoupling, rather than as a divorced couple?
The term was originally used by lifestyle coach Katherine Woodward Thomas, explains The Guardian, whose book, ‘Conscious Uncoupling: The Five Steps to Living Happily Even After’ was released in 2015.
Katherine explains that to use the term, both spouses don’t have to be on board with the divorce, or even happy that things are coming to an end. Conscious uncoupling is something that only one spouse may feel – it all depends what stage you are at in the separation process, and where you feel like your life is going.
There are those that believe life is short, ‘go do what you have to do’ and always look on the bright side. With this in mind, the concept of conscious uncoupling could help some people dealing with a divorce to realise that the situation is not as bleak as they formerly thought and if it works for them, then let them use it. After all, a divorce does doesn’t have to be acrimonious, and are, more often than you think, quite amicable- so to be ‘consciously uncoupled, and get on with your life, without falling out, can’t be a bad thing.
Obviously, if you don’t agree with the concept, then don’t worry – our local family solicitors won’t be slipping this one into their divorce dictionary just yet, but if you are going through a divorce, splitting up, and separating from your partner, then please do not hesitate to give our divorce experts a call. We are always here to help.
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